This post is exceptionally long; I haven’t written progress for awhile and need to catch you all up to speed.
As most kids are gearing up to start school, Astrid finished Summer school. She has 2 weeks off until she starts up again September 1st.
The last week of school was troublesome for Astrid. She (and I) had to go to the principal’s office. She slapped a teacher. She got frustrated because her dress got dirty; she wanted to walk around with no clothes on. The teacher was wiping her dress clean and Astrid flipped out … she slapped the teacher. I’m not sure how intentional it was, or if it was a reaction, but it landed her in the office and I had a firm talking to from the Principal. We have taught her that hitting is bad, but she is who she is, and she is feisty and strong willed.
Tonight, while putting her to bed she said to me: ‘Come Mommy. Come. Come here and give me some milk.’ She motioned to me as if she was calling a dog. Not cool. She tests me every day. If I say ‘no, don’t do that’, she will continue with the action to get a rise out of me. Bedtime is dreadful!! It takes her 45min-1 hour to get her in the bed with lights out. She says, ‘one more book’. ‘I have to go poop’, ‘one more hug’, ‘I’m hungry’. Now that she is in a big girl bed she has a lot more freedom to roam and will get out of her bed, turn on the light, and open the hallway door and call for me. Ugh! I have learned to let go and give the responsibility to Eric. When Eric takes over putting her to bed, Astrid knows it is time to go to sleep. I’m a little softer and compromising. But, when ‘I’m done’, I am seriously done.
She is talking non-stop! I didn’t think that I would ever say, ‘I wish that she didn’t talk so much’. She talks all of the time, very loudly, and very demanding. Her nick-name is Veruca Salt. She is a born leader (we believe) and it appears that she is 3 1/2 going on 50. She knows what she wants and is determined to get it. I don’t believe that she is spoiled, or that we give her everything that she wants, but she has a way of getting what she wants. It is quite brilliant how she is so damn strong and actually thinks before she talks. She knows what actions will get a certain reaction. She knows that if she is very sweet and loving that she can manipulate me (and most others) to get what she wants. I have seen her teachers cave, I have seen her aunts cave, and I have even seen Eric give in; that is HUGE because he is so stern and makes it a point not to spoil her.
As mentioned, she is now in a toddler bed; we finally got her out of the crib because she was starting to climb out. Her new sense of freedom is liberating and she feels more at comfort relaxing, reading and playing in bed. I have only told her once not to jump in bed because the curiosity of cause and effect overwhelms her. No jumping is interpreted as, ‘I wonder why I shouldn’t jump in bed so I will jump to find out why it is so bad’. I have learned how to cope with a strong-willed child. It challenges me every day, but in the back of my mind I am always saying, ‘relax and enjoy these early years because they will be gone very soon’.
Astrid is a very affectionate person. She loves to hug and kiss and I believe that there is definite heart and compassion behind her affection. She gives the biggest hugs for such a little person and demands Eric and I to hug. She has even brought us together by saying, ‘family hug’ (not sure where that came from). Family hug is all 3 of us hugging in a circle. She is very casual and friendly with strangers (scary), and will take a perfect stranger’s hand and lead them where she wants to go. She has gone into neighbor’s homes by telling them, ‘I want to see your house’. She has gone into my neighbor’s homes as if she owns it herself. I don’t EVER let her get out of my sight, knowing that she is so trusting and demanding with unfamiliar people. It scares me to think that she is so open with people that she doesn’t know, but at the same time I don’t want her to fear people and feel uncomfortable. I have always been with her as she’s going into someone’s house and I do know my neighbors (Megan’s Law).
Here are her latest stats on growth: she is now wearing 24 month-2T (depending on brand) and she is about 4-5 inches (1.5 heads) shorter than kids her age. I haven’t weighed her lately or measured her height so I don’t know, quite honestly, what she is on a scale. I am more relaxed about her growth because I know that she is 100% +++ intellectually complete. She is a little immature socially and it has been recommended that she complete another year of pre-school, than pre-K before she enters kindergarten. I’m very okay with that. I think that she needs it. Astrid is VERY conscious of her size. She is always telling me that she is small or little; she says that she needs to eat more so that she can grow. I know that she is getting this shit from school, and it bothers me a bit. She already gets teased and bullied from what I have seen on the playground and I just want to bully those kids right back. She holds her own and is very strong and diplomatic when the intimidation occurs. I have observed all this behavior. She walks away and snubs her nose at the bully. I hold myself back from getting too involved because I want her to learn; I don’t want to smother her and for her to think that mom is always going to be there to help her.
Charismatic is how I describe Astrid. She is, like I say, a born leader and is very smart and funny and can light up a room like no one I know. She has such a strong personality and she is very stubborn. Tonight, things weren’t going right for her and she said, ‘I’m going on timeout’. WOW! The reasoning behind her actions intrigues me. She can be a pain in the ass at times, and I have lost my patience and have had many anxious moments, but I love the girl. I am doing all that I can to lead her in the right direction, giving her top-notch schooling, and giving her little boundaries so as to not inhibit her growth mentally; I don’t let her get away with things, and teach her right from wrong. She is a free spirit and very independent. She is perfectly happy sitting on her bed dressing paper dolls and playing with her imaginary friend, ‘sister’. She is a voracious artist and has already created a style for herself. I can pick her drawing out from a classroom of 50. She has her own flair in apparel and will have a fit if her clothes don’t match; she has to wear pink panties if she is wearing a pink shirt. She is very girlie-girlie. She loves to dress up and wear make-up. She loves to carry a purse and she plays with Barbies. She sings and dances and loves the color pink (and purple). But, there is this side of her that is rough and tough and very analytical. She is a perfectionist and things in her world have to have a certain order. I have always been a little freaked out by her precision and even the teachers have noticed it and told me about their concerns with her compulsive behavior. I will continue to monitor it, but I do believe that she has a very strong tendency to be compulsive. I have seen her build houses out of blocks and it scares me; the colors are in a certain methodical order and the blocks are stacked completely straight. She will spend hours perfecting her house. If it doesn’t work out … hold guacamole!! She will throw the blocks across the room and rant and rave. She has to have her blanket on her bed (as she tells me) perfect. She will go back and forth straightening out her blanket until there isn’t a crease and it is perfectly aligned. After she goes potty, her toilet tissue has to be a certain length; not too short and not too long. She will freak and ‘do it again’ until she has found the perfect length. Astrid can draw the perfect circle!
She is a peculiar kid, but one that is very interesting and always new. I am so amazed how much she is learning and all the things she comes up with. I always ask her, ‘how did you know that?” She grins and gives me the most confident posture. She is very wise for her age. She is immature (compared to others) but she has this knowledge that is beyond me.
I hope to continue writing more. With my career it has been very difficult. I work 8 days a week and I am continually searching for time to write. I am writing for a real estate blog, which exhausts me from my personal writing. I have instructed Eric to post pictures!! I have compiled them all for him. He needs to get on the ball and post about 100 photos!!
